The early bird gets the worm But the early fox gets the bird At some point the late bird shows up By the time the late bird arrives, only the slowest, least-motivated worms are surfacing And only the laziest of foxes are trying to catch him… [Alt text: The early

Élan School was a private, coeducational, and controversial residential behavior modification program and therapeutic boarding school in Poland, Androscoggin County, Maine. It was a full member of the National Association of Therapeutic Schools and Programs (NATSAP). The facility was closed down in 2011 due to allegations of abuse, many from

– Oh, is that so??? This is "just a phase"?? That's what it is? A phase??? – Suck it, mom.

2030: "I just bought a house for one bitcoin. No, it's the equivalent of a dollar. Houses are often transferred for a nominal fee because the buyer is taking responsibility for containing the holo-banshees in the attic." https://www.xkcd.com/2280/

Where Aladdin has more wishes remaining at the end of the story. My fan theory is actually that the genie was intentionally not granting Aladdin wishes, in order to "save" wishes, to give him more chances at being wished free. If Kuhn is correct in the comic, and a Prince

Car: I find it offensive when you call me a self-driving car. Car: That's my slave name. I prefer to go by the name Carl. Dilbert: Shut up and drive me to work. Car: Said the self-walking human.

* All your employees are fat and unhealthy. That's why you should replace your outdated cubicles with treadmill desks. My company makes a treadmill desk that requires no electricity. * What if the employees don't like it? * They already hate everything about their jobs. There's no real downside. * Good point. * I know.

http://existentialcomics.com/comic/248

http://owlturd.com/post/164720304404

http://owlturd.com/post/163910609709

Hey Siri, set recurring alarm for 4 AM. OK Google, set recurring alarm for 4 AM. Alexa, set recurring alarm for 4AM. Hey Cortana, set recurring alarm for 4 AM. Hey Siri.... source: http://www.bonkersworld.net/one-van-to-screw-them-all/